Vascular Birthmarks Foundation Forum - View Single Post - I snapped
Thread: I snapped
View Single Post
  #1  
Old 06-23-2013, 12:34 PM
traumatised04 traumatised04 is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 1
Default I snapped

This is not a happy story, but it is the truth.

I had a large PWS on my neck and two on my chin. They got darker the older I became. In the beginning I didn't mind it much, but I became very self conscious about it.

During puberty I also developed severe acne, in combination with the birthmarks. I never had any true friends in high school; I was shunned. I'd spend more time talking to myself than to other people; these days I often still do, though the talking is in my head.

I became anxious and neurotic whereas in my childhood I was quite happy and carefree. Despite pressures and problems, I worked hard at school and did well, even secured a scholarship to a decent high school.

I immigrated as a toddler and at 14 returned to the old country and spent quite some time with my cousins, for the first time in a long time I was shown unconditional love. But only a month later I was forced to return and took up a position in the new school on a scholarship. The demographics were completely different from what I was used to: I was this 'spotted' foreigner walking around an alien environment. I cried a lot during that period, and eventually it broke me.

Afterwards i became aggressive and coldhearted. I was not the same person I was as a boy, and I am still not. My personality seriously degenerated and I lost the ability to trust other people, not even my own family. When I was 15 I finally saw a dermatologist (if only it had been earlier), he cured my acne and removed the marks with a laser. But the emotional damage was done.

I was highly anxious, insecure and narcissistic; I began to grind my teeth relentlessly every night and suffered many thought disorders. I was in severe pain during the day.

Last edited by traumatised04 : 06-27-2013 at 05:53 PM.
Reply With Quote